English 

*HOW ENGLISH AND ENGLISHMEN MAKE FUN OF EACH OTHER*
*Enjoy the fun & the pun.*
*Q: Can February March?*

*A: No. But April May!*
*Q: Did you hear about the painter who was hospitalised?*

*A: Reports say it was due to too many strokes!*
*Q: Have you heard the joke about the butter?*

*A: I better not tell you, it might spread!*
*Q: How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight?*

*A: Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?*
*Q: Music Teacher: What’s your favourite musical instrument?*

*A: Kid: The lunch bell!*
*Q: What did the triangle say to the circle?*

*A: You’re pointless!*
*Q: What do you call a ghosts mom and dad?*

*A: Transparents!*
*Q: What do you call a group of men waiting for a haircut?*

*A: A Barbercue!*
*Q: What do you call a person that chops up cereal*

*A: A cereal killer!*
*Q: What do you call a South American girl who is always in a hurry?*

*A: Urgent Tina!*
*Q: What do you call two fat people having a chat?*

*A: A heavy discussion!*
*Q: What kind of emotions do noses feel?*

*A: Nostalgia!*
*Q: What kind of shorts do clouds wear?*

*A: Thunderwear!*
*Q: What’s easy to get into but hard to get out of?*

*A: Trouble!*
*Q: Where do boats go to when they get sick?*

*A: The dock!*
*Q: Who cleans the bottom of the ocean?*

*A: A Mer-Maid!*
*Q: Why can’t a leopard hide?*

*A: Because he’s always spotted!*
*Q: Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?*

*A: Because then it would be a foot!*
*Q: Why did the barber win the race?*

*A: Because he took a short cut!*
*Q: Why did the boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?*

*A: He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!*
*Q: Why did the tomato turn red?*

*A: It saw the salad dressing!*
*Q: Why did the tree go to the dentist?*

*A: To get a root canal!*
*Q: Why don’t you see giraffes in elementary school?*

*A: Because they’re all in High School!*
*Q: Why was the maths book sad?*

*A: Because it had too many problems!*

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